Dear Sorority members, Bar-starlets, and or girls who wear copious amounts of hot pink,
Can I just ask you... why is it you feel the need to, as Tyra would say, tooch ya booty in every photo of you since the 6th grade? Seriously, I want to know!
Do you feel like popping your hip out is sexy? Figure flattering? Cute? Demure?!
While we are on the subject of posing, I would also like to ask why it is you then feel the need to tilt your head towards the camera. It would make sense if you were tilting those perfect blonde* curls towards the other person in the photo... but you do this in group shots and in all of the selfies you post to facebook and other various forms of social media!
Do you have a crick in your neck? Did someone just ask you a difficult question?
I am befuddled.
One more thing. Does blowing kisses at the camera get you play? I mean... I am a girl too... I get it, sometimes we can't help ourselves, these things happen... but when your entire feed looks like an emoji explosion in real life, one has to wonder.
Listen, do what you gotta do, tilt, bend, and believe that you are Americas Next Top Model. I will just be over here practicing my smize.
*not to stereotype, I love all races of hair color and sorority ethnic groups.
**Photos from Anna W on Lookbook... she has great style, her neck posing just makes me giggle.