Dear people of the world I have a request.
Could you please, while chewing, breathing, sitting, concentrating, snacking, watching a movie or otherwise, consider those around you!?
Allow me to explain.
MOUTH NOISES ARE (in fact) THE WORST THING (maybe) EVER. Smackers, loud chewers, (the girl perpetually sucking on hard candy next to me, whom I am moments away from punching in the face... kidding... but seriously), sloppy saliva slurpers, and chompers, I implore you, just listen to the noises you are making and, you know, maybe do it more quietly.
I realize we all do it. We can't help it. But when the sounds your mouth produces resemble a large suction vacuum it is time to intervene.
If you have a cold, deformed facial structure, braces, or other medical condition you are granted exemption. But to the rest of us, keep your tongue inside your mouth, chew like a lady (guys... this applies to you too), and stop smacking your gum ( you aren't a valley girl).