"Quality is not an act, it is a habit." -Aristotle
In a world where 'quality time' is defined as sitting in front of the television*, this statement really seems to hit home. What do we define as a 'quality' interaction these days? Do we have real conversations, covering real topics, which actually matter? Or has our vocabulary turned into one big circle jerk of short, complimentary, humble brags and gossip?
"Oh my god Kelly! I love your shirt- I just got one like that from Celine, so major right?!"
The art of conversation is truly a dying art, which makes me sad. People don't think they have time, therefore there is not time to invest into those around them on a deeper level; which is really the opposite of what the world needs. People need people, we need deep and meaningful relationships. If every interaction we participate in is nothing more than smoke an mirrors, how can we ever truly know someone? Better yet, how can we ever truly know ourselves if we are constantly just showing the surface?
There is something to be said for sitting down and just being in someones presence, fully, allowing each other to simply be. This action in and of itself allows for an openness, a vulnerability; it is absolutely terrifying (obvi) but these moments are the organs of life (the things which lie beneath the surface and make everything else function). Finding a person who you can be with, do things with, bare your soul to, or sit in utter silence with is a rare gift (when you find that person, that group of people, dig your heals in and never let go).
Making a habit of investing into people is not an easy one. Most of us would sooner befriend a saber-toothed tiger than have a meaningful conversation, which, though awesome, would end poorly. Conversation, the power of presence, finding common ground to walk on (together), builds a foundation for a quality relationships down the road.
Take a hike (no, literally, take a hike up a mountain), go to the beach, get coffee (or tea for those less fortunate non coffee lovers). Go to the park, have a crafternoon, go see a show, road trip, camp, dance, drink, laugh, star gaze, have an adventure, do yoga, sit in silence... be with those you want to have in your life... Find the people who are worth the investment and bank together. Side note- vampires are not welcome here (people who suck...your energy, your time, your emotions... they can gtfo am I right? aint no body got time for that) not to mention all the haters who can make like a ball and bounce! We need people who we can invest into and who will make daily (weekly, monthly, biannually, whatever it doesn't matter) deposits into the bank of our souls.
Good ol QT you guys, is there anything better? $Cha Ching$
*Please note- there is something to be said for sharing a love for a good TV show. MadMen and Breaking Bad have given us some of our favorite Sunday night moments with friends over the last year...However, while the shows may have been the catalyst our time together, talking, laughing, drinking wine and sharing a meal, meant far more than Don Draper or Walter White ever will (treason I know!).
**Photo of Drew leaving a gallery show we went to on a whim. Time was spent in great conversation with amazing friends and artists in our community... and to think we almost didn't go.